People are dying to try BAGnTAG's new Bounty Hunting service
April 6, 2010 5:00 p.m. By Emily BergerDo you have a missing relative? Are you in love with someone and want to track him or her down? Is there a pesky person who owes you money in gambling that has left town? If so, BAGnTAG's new Bounty Hunting service is perfect for you! The Bounty Hunting service offers a wide variety of secret individuals who can track down that special someone for you.
The next thing you know they will be stuffed in a bag
By filling out a short 200-page questionnaire, and with our brand new, state of the art technology, BAGnTAG will be able to match the perfect bounty hunter with your specific bounty. Need to make this anonymous? That’s okay! Our computer system keeps your identity secret. To log into the system, or call an operator, you will be provided with a randomized 8 character password. It changes every day to make sure that your information is kept private.
Our Bounty Hunters have been trained specifically for tracking people down. They will learn everything they need to know by reading the questionnaire that you filled out. To make sure they understand everything, we will test them on it. Afterwards they will research for two weeks and follow the trails to track down your bounty. During this process you will be supplied with our microscopic ear bud, so that you can hear everything that is happening with the bounty. Once found, your Bounty Hunter will dress up in a suit to act like a secret spy and tackle your special someone.
The next thing you will know they will be stuffed in a BAG, be TAGged and sent to a secret location that you will find out an hour before. You don’t want to see them ever again? That’s okay, let us know in the comment section of the questionnaire and we will make sure that they will never be around you again.
Buying the Bounty Hunter will give you a 20% discount on all your BAGnTAG needs. This means 20% off of your favorite guns, handcuffs and other super secret bounty hunting needs.
Do you want to become a Bounty Hunter? Great! We just need to make sure you are up to par! All Bounty Hunters must have 2 years of experience in either the criminal field or opposing the criminal field. They must be able to run across the United States in 3 days and not be opposed to wearing black.